Relationship Advice

Let us first define what communication really is. If you ask Merriam and Webster – they would say that communication is the act of transmitting a verbal or written message; simple enough and very easy to do. But why do most relationships fail for this very simple reason?

In a relationship, it is not necessary that you go through everything that went on in your day with your partner. Communication goes far beyond words that are spoken. It is both mental and verbal, and at certain times, even physical.

Most relationships that fail do so because one or both parties involved do not take the time to communicate. You must be able to express your thoughts and your feelings, and at the same time, be able to absorb your partner’s thoughts and feelings.

Communication is a Two Way Process

You can sit with your partner and talk to them all day about everything. But if they do not listen, then it is useless. People tend to forget that the art of listening is even more important than the art of talking. You will both learn and grow if you know how to listen. Subsequently, you must not take control of the whole conversation. You must also give your partner a chance to express himself, and you also need to listen. That way, you can build a deeper understanding of each other.

Is Your Partner not Communicating?

It is possible that this is because you are too consumed with your feelings and you only focus on what is wrong with them. Your ears are only open to what you are saying, not to what they’re saying. Do not forget, you are not perfect, and neither are they. What you must do is to open yourself to what they have to say and involve your partner in resolving the problem. Remember, this is the main reason why you are in a relationship. That means if there is a problem, you have to work things out together.

Another form of effectively communicating is being able to recognize your partner’s thoughts through their actions. There really are people who do not speak much, which is why you must learn to identify if there is something that they wanted to say. Be sensitive enough to recognize if there is something unusual in the way they react of if they start doing things that they do not often do. Your deep understanding of your partner’s personality and character will be useful here.

Working Things Out

Some people enter into a relationship thinking that they will not encounter any problem. Sorry to pop your bubble, but you do not live in Wonderland. You will definitely stumble upon issues and have disagreements. You must realize that this does not mean that your relationship is not meant to be or that you have to let it go. You have to work things out. You both have to communicate. Always remember, communication strengthens your bond and if you know how to communicate, your relationship can certainly be a lasting one.

Experiencing feelings of doubt about a relationship is common, and successfully navigating the waters of this close connection requires making difficult decisions where a person must think deeply and honestly. Most people are happy to deny the truth and to remain in a relationship that might not be healthy. Taking the initiative to examine the relationship really is a good idea when it seems something might be wrong.

Basic and necessary elements that allow a connection to remain successful include physical contact, emotional connections, intellectual unions, and similar interests. These basic items must exist in harmony with one another to keep a relationship strong and healthy. A couple doesn’t need to be exactly alike in every area of life, but some similarities are valuable.

When a person feels that they are no longer connecting with a partner, it is essential to think about the following ways that might reveal a relationship isn’t going the way it should and that a parting of ways might be the best solution.

Happiness levels

The most important feeling in a relationship is that of happiness. A person who isn’t happy when they are around their significant other might not be with the right person, or something might need to change in his or her relationship status. Relationships do take effort and compromise, but they should also reward constant happiness.

Self-esteem problems

A relationship should inspire confidence in someone, and if there are self-esteem issues that seem to appear when a person is in contact with their boyfriend or girlfriend that could be a sign something is wrong in the relationship. Sometimes this issue is just the result of bad communication, but it’s an important factor in a healthy relationship.

Being apart feels better

If the time that someone spends apart from a significant other feels better than the time  the couple spends together, there might be a problem. If the actual reasons for why a couple might need to break up outnumber those why the couple should remain together, it might be time to discuss parting ways.

Thinking about others

If a person has consistent thoughts about other people he or she might want to date even though he or she is in a relationship, this might be a sign that something is wrong or that the relationship isn’t where the person wants to be. Noticing someone who walks by and thinking that the person is attractive is fairly natural, but thinking too often about other people isn’t normal.

Friends don’t like him/her

Although the advice of friends is not always the first thing a person should consider about his or her relationship, it’s important to listen to friends if they feel that the association isn’t healthy or is causing problems. Sometimes friends may notice issues in a relationship that the people who are inside the relationship might not realize exist.

It’s very easy for a person in a relationship to ignore their better judgment and try to remain in the relationship even though they know that something is wrong. Ignoring one’s own opinion is common where there is a relationship on the line. Taking the initiative to think and consider why a relationship might be headed in the wrong direction offers the best opportunity to ensure the association is healthy.

Many people will claim that nothing manages to hurt quite as deeply as love when things go wrong. When the possible consequences involve an indescribable amount of emotional pain the question of why we allow ourselves to put our affections on the line inevitably crosses the mind. The simplest available answer for this is that it is human nature to want to find someone to spend time with exclusively and to share your heart with.

Toying with someone’s emotions is cruel beyond any accurate description and it can severely damage a person when they are on the receiving end of this. There are some people who seem to be oblivious to the hurt that can be caused from this and those who fit into this category are often called players. It is impossible to foresee how events will transpire or what a person is truly like when you do not know them but there are telltale signs of a player to be on your guard for.

A Full-On Approach

When you are particularly strongly attracted to someone it tends to feel as if they are the only thing that really matters at that moment. It is important to point out that it is possible to mistake this for someone who is genuine but if it feels like someone is going to extraordinary lengths to whisk you away then it is possible they are a player looking at you as nothing more than a challenge.

Elusive Character

A player will tend to give the impression that they want to know all about you while at the same time being incredibly guarded about sharing information about their own life. If it begins to quickly feel as if you have shared a lot of details with this person but you cannot seem to get below the surface with them then you may well have reason to be wary. Finding out later on that they were lying or hiding something is not out of the question in this situation.

Breaking Away from Dating Conventions

In dating and relationships, it is a good idea to be skeptical about someone who seems to display an overwhelming sense of self-assurance. Confidence is good but it is advisable to look out for someone who tends to step away from the usual dating conventions of subtly showing their attraction and asking you for your number.

Wandering Eye for Others

If you are dating someone then it is certainly reasonable to expect you to be the only object of their affections. When you are out together it should set off alarm bells if you can spot him making eyes at other people.

Keeping You a Secret

There is arguably nothing that screams the word ‘player’ quite as loudly as someone who wants to keep you a secret. If you want to make it public knowledge that you are together but they are dead against it then you have a right to wonder why. Consequently, don’t be forced into anything you don’t want to do or give your affections away easily.