Please understand me

Do you believe that a book can change your life? I do and it does. It's called "Please understand me" and it has two versions. The version I read is the 2nd version.

Is this change good? I can't tell. I agree when you gain something you usually lose something else and the same, when you lose something you gain something else. It all depends on the importance of what you gain or on how you view what you gain. Do you appreciate and cherish it?

I was in my deep depression finishing a precious friendship with a like-minded male friend. It was a kind of perfect friendship journey once in one's life. It's finished because we were too young or because I didn't read the book.

Sometimes when you are sad about finishing a relationship with your ex-lover or the like, it's not because you are still in love with him/her, rather, because you don't understand how and why this ends. You always think you can learn from your previous failures when you know the reasons and then you can move on to the next one, however, it doesn't definitely work the next time, simply because the next relationship is different, the next person is different. You don't understand who he/she is from your point of view.

The good point for me to know these differences revealed by this book is that I understand others better although I'm not changed and neither is the other person; It helps get along with others better. However, the other point is when I understand others better but the others still don't I become even more lonely.

Well, I admit that each individual has his/her path, destiny. I see what I gain and appreciate it and I agree that real life itself is imperfect, therefore, I'm contented with my loneliness and at least, with the perfection stays in my memories. The amount of friends other people have around or amount of family members other people have around are their victories but just like Canada's tranquility, without such quantities, I'm cotented with what I have and they are my fortune, my treasure.

So here comes this book. It has a Character Sorter. When you try the shortcut and do the Sorter usually you can't get an accurate image of yourself because you don't truly understand the questions and answers and perhaps you don't even know yourself! You won't really know yourself till you thoroughly read this book in great detail.

The following is the brief of the book. If you want to save a vital relationship from failure or if you want to grow and keep a successful relationship when it just starts it's very helpful for you or even your partner both to read this book; especially when you have question marks why some of your previous relationships end similarly, it's fairly important for you to understand who they are, why they attract you and why it still ends finally.

The main idea of the author's view is that people are different! You can't say that they are odd just because of the differences and if so, then you are odd too! People deserve to be respected for what they are. It's a good start if you know who you are and know your image in others' eyes. You can't change yourself, however, at least you know your weaknesses and you know how to hold others the least harmful by keeping the best distance with others. "Harm" can be anything mentally that makes others feel uncomfortable or sad.

Then the next step for you is to understand others, understand who they are, understand the differences, understand why some people have a kind of excessive cleanliness while you are proud of your spontaneousness without knowing that some of your small surprises of uninvited visits make these reserved people uncomfortable rather than romantic; you will understand why some people are so sweet while some others sound cold and you happen to fall in love with the latter then you are going starving for a bit more sweetness from your partner. You will understand that love can't be measured by sweetness; the hidden sweetness is probably the deepest. Your partner can also feel uncomfortable of your excessive sweetness - too feminine in some people's eyes...

I am an artistic idealist influenced by guardian and rational. I know that meal is important than other idealists do. The author Dr. Keirsey said, "No matter what kind of persons Idealists marry, however, it is not too much to say that they are the best of all the temperaments at creating successful and fulfilling marriages. Their sensitivity, their spirit of cooperation, their ability to communicate their feelings, their passion for their mates, and their desire for deep bonding, their personal warmth and enthusiasm – all these traits work their magic in the Idealists' relationships." This is true that the one who mates with idealist is happy, however, on the other hand, idealist becomes the one who has to put up with all the harm passively. That resulted in my depression and sadness. That's also how and why I learned from rational how to be rational. That's why I cherish health and happiness over the rest.

- Min Min