http://www.understandyourrelationship.com/2007/05/poor-loser.html A charming person is the one with whom you love each other but not the one who loves you alone or the one whom you love alone. Sun, 29 Aug 2010 13:32:52 -0600 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.6 hourly 1 http://www.understandyourrelationship.com/2007/05/poor-loser.html/comment-page-1#comment-4 shoop Tue, 13 Jan 2009 01:29:00 +0000 http://www.loveisdream.com/relation/?p=37#comment-4 Great advice... EVER argue with a narcissist. You can't get them to be reasonable, fair, kind, decent, or loving (much less force them to tell the truth or take any responsibility for their actions or bad behavior.) As someone who grew up surrounded by highly educated, over achieving N's (mother, father, older sister) I know firsthand that the only thing that results from arguing with an N is that you will get very hurt, very confused, rather frustrated and angry, and feel completely crazy yourself. (Which to them is a win over you). You are playing a game (and it is a game!) that they invented for themselves to win... and they WILL win, have no doubt. Facts don't matter to them... truth doesn't matter to them...YOU don't matter to them (beyond what strokes their ego or serves their own selfish interests...) <br/>The whole gist of being an N seems to be that nothing matters more to them than thier own self image. And those self images have nothing to do with any actual reality... Arguing with them is never going to alter that, no matter how much you want to believe that there is a good person "somewhere in there DEEP DEEP down". Save yourself a trip to the rubber room... <br/>Thanks for the post! Great advice… EVER argue with a narcissist. You can’t get them to be reasonable, fair, kind, decent, or loving (much less force them to tell the truth or take any responsibility for their actions or bad behavior.) As someone who grew up surrounded by highly educated, over achieving N’s (mother, father, older sister) I know firsthand that the only thing that results from arguing with an N is that you will get very hurt, very confused, rather frustrated and angry, and feel completely crazy yourself. (Which to them is a win over you). You are playing a game (and it is a game!) that they invented for themselves to win… and they WILL win, have no doubt. Facts don’t matter to them… truth doesn’t matter to them…YOU don’t matter to them (beyond what strokes their ego or serves their own selfish interests…)
The whole gist of being an N seems to be that nothing matters more to them than thier own self image. And those self images have nothing to do with any actual reality… Arguing with them is never going to alter that, no matter how much you want to believe that there is a good person “somewhere in there DEEP DEEP down”. Save yourself a trip to the rubber room…
Thanks for the post!

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