am-i-wrong

Am I Wrong to Look at my Husband’s Inbox Messages

I have been with my husband for 10 years, married for 2 1/2 of those years. We have 4 children. We get along well but my husband has been seeking local women from a social website for the past couple of years. Each time I have caught him up by bringing up his account and reading inbox messages he’s sent to these women. The women almost never respond back to him.

I'm only happy when it rains.

We have had arguments about it over and over. Just yesterday I found out that he emailed an individual saying he wanted to see her naked breasts. When I confronted him, he told me I was wrong for looking at his account because it’s his own privacy and I have no right.

So my question is am I wrong if he accidentally leaves his account open and I look at his inbox messages, or should I be more attentive to what he is doing since I already know something is not right?

– Angie

Min Min says:
June 11, 2010 at 7:01 pm
Hi Angie,

If your husband told you that it was wrong to look at his account then you should not.

Of course it’s reasonable for you to be more attentive.

However, you should work out your relationship in a more positive way than simply arguing about it over and over.

You should have a conversation with your husband. Tell him how you feel and ask him how he feels if you message someone else like this.

Also ask him what can help make him happy to see if you can compromise to each other. He has sexual needs to meet while has moral responsibility.

Mrs W. says:
July 27, 2010 at 4:28 pm
Omygosh…its clear he’s on the verge of adultery if he hasn’t already emotionally or physically. Talking to him won’t do a bit of good. You approaching him about email got him to manipulate the situation so well to say your invading privacy of his. He’s overlooking the fact that he’s stepping away from your sacred marriage by investing lustful suggestions to. women. He’s truly truly bad news if you stay married to him!
What makes him think what he does is morally right? What would he feel if tables were turned? He doesn’t see your marriage as sacred or none of what he’s doing would be happening. Actions of his speak way beyond ANYTHING ELSE.

sadgirl says:
March 3, 2011 at 4:03 am
Hi, Mrs W..

Hope your are fine..

Well, we are alost in the same boat. But, i dont have a kid yet. If i were in your position, i will just ignore his in everything as long he does his responbility as a father to my children. Why not u just live for your 4 beautiful children? they should be your concern ( make sure they dont follow the dad in future ) …. just a suggestion… plz correct me if i am wrong!…

god bless u always!