Our client was a man married for 12 years with an 8 year old daughter. Their marriage had always been a happy one. He was kind and generous and had no reason to suspect that his wife would ever want to leave him or want to be with anybody else. Sex was good and they had a happy social life with plenty of good friends. Then their sexual relationship started to decline and finally come to a complete halt. Although they have had no reason to argue about anything in particular recently, for some reason the atmosphere at home had become very strained between them with her attitude becoming increasingly hostile. She was constantly finding fault with everything he said or did, undeservedly so. Of course when he finally plucked up the courage to enquire if there was a problem, she was very quick to say ‘everything is just fine’. Surely it could just be a ‘mid life crisis’? If it hadn’t been the fact that her mobile phone was her new constant companion he may have just left it be and waited out the storm. Even more hurt and confused when her behaviour worsened, he tried to confront her again. She completely denied that anything was wrong and that if he really believed she was cheating, where was his proof. Beside himself with paranoia now, he had to know what was really behind the change in their once happy relationship. If it was proof he needed, how was he to get it without arousing her suspicions? A private investigator seemed the obvious choice and he finally gave us a call.
To prove one way or the other whether his wife was indeed having an affair, we advised him that we could trace her daily movements using a superior professional vehicle tracking device. This would tell him exactly where she was going as she left the house and all her movements until she came home and most importantly where she stopped and for how long. He thought this would be a fantastic way of knowing what was going on and immediately instructed us to fit our device. This proved a great success when, on the very first evening after fitting our device, he asked her how her day was, he knew the details of her very ‘full’ day she reeled off to him that evening were in fact totally untrue. This made his stomach churn. She had not even left the house except to do the school run? So why lie? The same pattern emerged over the next few days. What was she doing at home all day whilst pretending otherwise?
Our next suggestion was to obtain photographic and video evidence of the comings and goings of any visitors while our client was at work. We placed a static surveillance van outside the vicinity of their house so as to record all activity surrounding their property. After one week there seemed to be a pattern emerging. There was only ever one visitor to the property. At the same time every day, a large female would arrive and be greeted very warmly by our client’s wife and then again when that female left after lunch. On seeing the film footage, our client was surprised to find it was the wife of one of their good friends. It also seemed to him that his wife was spending more and more time in the evening on the phone to her. When this woman started to turn up in the evenings, our client started to become suspicious that something wasn’t quite right. Her mannerisms were that of somebody who felt very at home and indeed; he was made to feel rather uncomfortable in their presence in his own home, and would go to bed leaving them to their giggles and jokes downstairs.
Keeping in constant communication with our client and after further discussion, we were of the professional opinion that these two women could in fact be in a relationship. To get the concrete proof needed to confront his wife once and for all, we discussed how best to achieve this. We wanted to create an opportunity allowing his wife and her lover sufficient time alone together therefore enabling us to gather any undeniable evidence proving her infidelity. Coincidentally, our client was due to take their annual ski holiday the following week. His wife had surprised him by making her excuses this year saying he should still go on his own with their daughter. This was the perfect opportunity we were looking for. On his instruction and with his permission we installed covert security cameras throughout the property. On our client’s return he was shocked and devastated to come face to face with, in his own words, the ‘disgusting truth’ about his wife’s friendship with this woman. She had wasted no time since he had been gone. The two women had spent every night together and video footage had left him in no doubt at all that this was not a platonic friendship.
He was totally shocked with her response when confronted. She declared it was all a horrible mistake and if he could please take her away from the situation. She didn’t want to see her lover again. She hadn’t known what she was doing and it was as if she had been under a spell. Thinking that maybe she was so genuinely distraught she could actually be telling the truth and wanting to find a way of saving their marriage if only for the sake of their daughter, our client suggested they leave to visit friends in Australia the very next day. After an emotional but happy two week trip where normality of a kind resumed, they returned home with the intent of selling up and emigrating there.
The Last Straw
However, whilst unpacking our client found a mystery mobile phone hidden away. Of course there was no evidence of any calls or texts so with a heavy heart he gave us the phone and instructed us to perform a forensic sweep. Unfortunately for our client, we unearthed numerous calls made during their reconciliation trip to Australia, and text messages indicating that the relationship between the two women was still very much alive. They had been planning to set up home together on her return and had actually used the opportunity of the trip to gain more time. He thought this was despicable and the last straw and he used this evidence to instigate divorce proceedings.
I miss her desperately, i can see her in my mind, her smile, her beautiful brown eyes, her hair.. i love her energy she makes me feel higher than any drug could…
When she talks i listen to her every word, her voice is soft and sweet, i love her pronunciation , her accent and the way she uses body language to punctuate her words , i love her…..
It seems so long ago but at the same time only yesterday since i held her in my arm’s, made love to her, Kissed her lips, and fell asleep in her arms, i long for those nights again…
When i saw her last it had been about a month since we didnt see eachother and then, the second she walked into the room i was breathless … i mean really !! i thought “my god, how are you so perfect?” i would have got down on one Knee for her right then…..
What hurts the most is knowing that she’s with someone else, someone who doesnt deserve her, doesnt know what he’s got, cant treat her the way she should be, cant give her the thing’s that matter, not material stuff, that kind of love where you become a better person because you want to be all you can for her, be there for her in the good times and the bad, share life together, build a future together….
I know she cares, and i think i know she wants it too…
I can see it in her eyes, i can hear it in her voice, in the way she smiles at me, holds my hand…
Its a look she gives of wanting something but can’t quite take the step….
I dont know if i should try and give her that push or if i should stand back and let thing’s fall where they may….
But i’ve been hurt by waiting before, if you want someone shouldn’t you fight for them ?? show them how much you truly care about them ?? It’s hard to know….
If happiness is being able to wake up every morning next to the person you love, then i can only say that the first thing i think of when i wake up and the last thing when i lay down to sleep is you… Mariana, I LOVE YOU.
June 14, 2009 at 4:40 am
you write such beautiful words and it probably takes a lot to put that all down and pour out your heart so well done for that..
in my experience it will only make you sick waiting..
dont you imagine her with someone else, kissing them, touching them it is not real love if it is stretched between people. and shame on her for having 2 guys wrapped around her finger, its selfish.
i know how much it hurts to cut ties its pain and you never quite regain trust or find the same bond for a very long time, but if you walk away you can keep your dignity, you can put your heart on the line then walk away holding it intact rather tahn letting yourself fall into a puddle of what could be..
we dont choose who we fall in love with it would be so much easier if we could but its experience that leads you to true understanding thats why old people are wise they feel and hurt and see and know.
hope my words could have helped you a little.
good luck and have courage
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