How Not To Date a Video Game Addict

Addiction is a very difficult thing.  Most people think about alcohol or drugs when this topic is brought up. Many experts on addiction have begun to realize that people can be addicted to video  computer game playing.  There is growing evidence that people are spending considerable time being consumed with playing these games.

For you, there is someone new in your life. You discover he plays video games obsessively, morning, noon and night. Finding out that the person you met is a video addict, makes you have to decide if it is  worth your time to invest in the relationship. No matter how much support he or she receives, anyone who has dealt with addiction knows it is a very difficult thing for someone to overcome.

Video Game Addiction – What Does It Look Like?

Addiction to games comes in various forms. Some people get addicted to games that provide them a sense of winning or succeeding. It is this sense of power that gives them achievement over something in their life. This person needs to feel that he is successful. Video games gives him the outlet to have power over an enemy or game villain. This person may become addicted to multi-player games. These games give him a way to socialize and feel powerful anonymously. He stay engages in playing video  games that lasts for hours. During these times, the focus is excessive. His interest in normal everyday activities, like eating and sleeping, declines. He respond negatively to anyone who interrupts him, while he is playing.

How Not to Date an Addict

Problems arise when one person in the relationship is addicted to video games. It is noticeable by the other person, that there’s a lack of attention to their needs. Quality time together is no longer a priority. There is a lack of interest in couple activities, and with no meaningful interactions, the relationship is hanging on by a thread. Without being involved in the game activities of the other, you feels neglected and disrespected. It becomes increasingly clear to you that the games have replace you as the object of his affection. You have discovered that you can not possibly compete with these mesmerizing games. These games creates exciting adventures on the screen for someone to become a game addict.

What to do about someone addicted to video games?

1 – Communicate how you feel – but avoid nagging. Trying to get a gamer to stop playing completely, is unrealistic. It won’t get you anywhere, unless he wants to quit. Instead, tell him how you feel about the excessive about of time he gives to playing games. Let him know that you want to be with him where the two of you can do other things together. Express that you feel the two of you are drifting apart.

 2 – Need for Change – In order for a relationship to succeed, something needs to change.

If the person you are involve with doesn’t recognize a need to change his addictive behavior, then it presents a serious problem to the relationship. You will have to decide, if you want to continue the relationship. Without a willingness on the part of the other person to work toward change, you won’t get what you need to maintain the relationship. He has to recognize the seriousness of the problem and the need for a change. If not, you have to make it clear to him, that the relationship cannot continue in its current state of his addictive video playing.

If he agrees to change, come up with a schedule that works for both of you. Make sure it includes time away from video games. It is not about making your partner stop playing video games altogether. It about setting priorities, where both your needs will be met in a satisfactory way. Be considerate of their interests too. But, help the relationship remains strong through talking things out, and reach toward a solution you both are willing to accept

3 – It’s time to walk away – Unfortunately, even with all the conversations and plans to change, a video game addict may not be able to tear himself away from the lure of gaming. In the end, choosing a video game over you clearly demonstrates that he is not ready or able to be in a positive committed relationship. It’s a difficult thing—but you may continue to experience repeated addictive behavior from your partner. The cold hard reality you have to face, is, it’s time to walk away.

 

Unicorn Hunting: The Quest for Perfection in Online Dating

Millions of people every day log on to popular online dating websites from their home computer or their phone to find someone to connect to. When you are on the quest for a new relationship or casual encounter, you might scroll through a lot of pictures and profiles to find one you want to message. Although there are many options, some people are incredibly picky about who they consider. Knowing what you want is a good thing, but being too focused on perfection can ruin your chances of finding a date.

What is Unicorn Hunting?

This is not about ancient tapestries or fantasy movies. The phrase “unicorn hunting” is used to describe someone who is looking for perfection in a new boyfriend or girlfriend. The unicorn is the perfect person who checks all their boxes on a list of must-have criteria. Unfortunately for the people who are also looking for a date, achieving this level of fantasy perfection is just that: fantasy.

It all comes down to unrealistic expectations. The chance of finding the absolute perfect person and identifying them from their online dating portfolio is very slim.

What is Wrong With Strict Criteria for Online Dating?

People who give relationship advice sometimes tell you never to settle for less than what you truly want. This attitude taken to the extreme leads to unicorn hunting, which makes it difficult to find anyone.

If your checklist for the perfect partner is too long, detailed, or exclusionary, no one will be able to live up to your expectations.

If you find this so-call perfect person, this unicorn in human form, it can introduce unexpected conflict into your relationship. The person may seem perfect on paper or a screen. If they end up being not so perfect in person, you may feel let down or cheated. If you accept that everyone has flaws from the start, you will avoid being disappointed.

How to Avoid Unicorn Hunting

People approach online dating in many different ways. Some are just looking for a fun night out with an attractive person. Others want to casually date, they simply want someone to call up on the weekend to share an outing. Still others are looking for a serious relationship that lasts as long as possible.

Seeking perfection can stop you from having a good time and meeting someone special.
The one person you date or enter a relationship with is not solely responsible for your sense of self-worth and happiness. That is up to you. If you look to the perfect unicorn to provide everything you ever dreamed of, you have truly stepped into the realm of fantasy.

Forget Perfection: Online Dating Tips

In the time of legends, brave knights set out from the castle and hunted a unicorn for days, weeks, months, and even years. Some never found one at all and wasted their whole life on a quest for this fantastic beast. Similarly, seeking perfection in online dating can consume much of your time and energy. It can ultimately leave you lonely for long periods.

Come up with a list of criteria that you desire in someone, that you refused to compromise on. It can be serious things like smoking, employment status, educational level, age, religion, interests, whether he or she want to have children. You decide what’s most important to you, things you cannot give up for someone.

Take time to get to know the person that wants your heart. Make sure they are willing to you their heart too. Even without the perfect unicorn profile, if you are open, you can find people who you will get along with wonderfully.

No matter what type of connection you want, the most important thing to remember is that every person is human and fallible. If you discover someone who seems perfect to you, they might actually be a bot. Keep in mind, that some people lie about who they are, what they do, and even their interests, just to try to attract you. Look for someone, who is real and compatible with you.

Don’t be lull into a false sense of security, believing you have found that perfect one,  only to discover it’s based on superficial criteria.

Staying Connected To The One You Love